Mental health awareness day

Danny

Administrator
Today is not only mental health awareness day but it also marks the day that would change my life for ever.

After dengue fever I suffered some huge mental health problems. Anxiety and panic attacks coupled with massive hits of depression and worry.

Took me 7byears to recover and battle through. I was lucky...

Many people are not strong enough to keep fighting and they end up paying the ultimate price.

It is good to talk about mental health
 

essexandy

The Lake Governor
Today is not only mental health awareness day but it also marks the day that would change my life for ever.

After dengue fever I suffered some huge mental health problems. Anxiety and panic attacks coupled with massive hits of depression and worry.

Took me 7byears to recover and battle through. I was lucky...

Many people are not strong enough to keep fighting and they end up paying the ultimate price.

It is good to talk about mental health
Yeah I've suffered from depression for eight years on and off. I not convinced that once you've had it that you're ever fully over it.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
I'm not going to lie I've been in a really dark place a couple of times. My life right now could never make me stupid enough to leave them behind. I think it's take a change to realise how amazing life can be. I always let things build up then have an explosion never been truly able to talk about my emotions.
First steps realising you gave a problem then realising the only person who can help you is yourself.
 

johnzo

Active Member
I've always said the worst place for a man to live is in his own head there can be some very dark places in there .i think theres not a man among us that hasn't suffered from depression of some level through there lifes .
My brother in law had it bad and god bless him his demons got the better of him .all i can say lads is stay strong. talk and take each day as it comes
 

Andy g

Well-Known Member
I've always said the worst place for a man to live is in his own head there can be some very dark places in there .i think theres not a man among us that hasn't suffered from depression of some level through there lifes .
My brother in law had it bad and god bless him his demons got the better of him .all i can say lads is stay strong. talk and take each day as it comes
That f**k**g rigsby got it right got out 89 it f**k**g mental and physical
 
I really like this thread. I teach at college and a lot of time it feels as though your head is going to explode. I have been in a dark place quite a lot recently, not always job related. It's good that we can offload, even though I'm not a regular contributor to what I believe to be a great forum. The posts inform, educate and entertain (and sometimes disappoint !) me. Thanks again for everyone's honesty.
 

JessThePlasterer

Queen Jess Elizabeth I
I think it’s societal that men tend not to speak about how they feel. I’ve had this conversation with my other half before and he’s much better at talking to me now. Before he’d bottle everything up with bad consequences.

Think blokes in this country feel they need to be in control and take care of everybody which leads to a lot of pressure. Women talk to each other all the time and are better off for it
 
I think it’s societal that men tend not to speak about how they feel. I’ve had this conversation with my other half before and he’s much better at talking to me now. Before he’d bottle everything up with bad consequences.

Think blokes in this country feel they need to be in control and take care of everybody which leads to a lot of pressure. Women talk to each other all the time and are better off for it
I agree with you Jess in many ways, but it's not as though I don't talk with my mates about how we feel. It just struck me as pertinent that a thread like this would end up popping up on a plasterer's forum!
 
Thanks. I've been on the fringes for about a year and there's some really good advice and information being shared. I put in my ha' pennerth worth every now and again.
 

paulf

Well-Known Member
I think it’s societal that men tend not to speak about how they feel. I’ve had this conversation with my other half before and he’s much better at talking to me now. Before he’d bottle everything up with bad consequences.

Think blokes in this country feel they need to be in control and take care of everybody which leads to a lot of pressure. Women talk to each other all the time and are better off for it
Your right about men being reluctant to talk about mental health issues mainly because of the reaction they might get. That fear that you'll be perceived as weak. I suppose some guys take life to seriously and feel that they have to adhere to some mythical manly code.
I know what you're saying about women being more inclined to talk about how they feel but I think that some women can be the worst when they think a man is weak.
Historical i know.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2008/nov/11/first-world-war-white-feather-cowardice
https://www.opendemocracy.net/5050/nicoletta-f-gullace/white-feather-girls-womens-militarism-in-uk
 

essexandy

The Lake Governor
I'm not going to lie I've been in a really dark place a couple of times. My life right now could never make me stupid enough to leave them behind. I think it's take a change to realise how amazing life can be. I always let things build up then have an explosion never been truly able to talk about my emotions.
First steps realising you gave a problem then realising the only person who can help you is yourself.
I do agree but also believe that others, friends and family in particular, can be a great help.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
I do agree but also believe that others, friends and family in particular, can be a great help.
I'm not denying talking to others helps I just mean when it really matters there's only you to decide we're you're going to go with it. I've lost a few family members with it they were crying out for help which they got but in the end they decided to go the other way which broke a lot of family up.
 

Danny

Administrator
I have to be kept busy or I get frustrated and angry...

I then go very quiet and at this point Jane knows and then tries to get me to sod off to the garage where I the potter about and make something...

I have always got projects on the go and working on my kit car keeps me good... it also stresses me out at some points of the year but still
 

John j

Mono Don
When i feel depressed and down I talk to wife . She gives me same advice .
Get a grip.
That then sends me to my I wish I had a desert island and didn't have to deal with any f**k*r again mood. This last till next pay day normally.

Joking apart I do get down . If darling ex.s fucks of to oz with kids It will get to me but i do have a pretty good f**k it .It is what it is attitude .
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
I have to be kept busy or I get frustrated and angry...

I then go very quiet and at this point Jane knows and then tries to get me to sod off to the garage where I the potter about and make something...

I have always got projects on the go and working on my kit car keeps me good... it also stresses me out at some points of the year but still
Thats another thing that I feel people who had bouts of depression really don't deal with stress well.. And I believe that is now one of the biggest killers
 
I'm not denying talking to others helps I just mean when it really matters there's only you to decide we're you're going to go with it. I've lost a few family members with it they were crying out for help which they got but in the end they decided to go the other way which broke a lot of family up.
Yeah, we had a similar situation with our brother, who decided he'd come to the end of the line. I can understand why someone loses sight of things but it leaves a lot of emotional devastation in its wake. Somebody earlier in the thread talked about 'not spending too much time in your own head' which I completely agree with.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
Yeah, we had a similar situation with our brother, who decided he'd come to the end of the line. I can understand why someone loses sight of things but it leaves a lot of emotional devastation in its wake. Somebody earlier in the thread talked about 'not spending too much time in your own head' which I completely agree with.
I've got to agree that radio is vital for me because it's frightening at times what I think about we're it comes from I don't no. I've got a really nice life now. But thoughts of madness are always there. There's always that saying that they don't care at the time what anybody else thinks except the demon
Inside there own head telling them what they want to do.
And as for money being a big help that's not the case either I've been really down when I've had plenty and everything's going well.
 
I've got to agree that radio is vital for me because it's frightening at times what I think about we're it comes from I don't no. I've got a really nice life now. But thoughts of madness are always there. There's always that saying that they don't care at the time what anybody else thinks except the demon
Inside there own head telling them what they want to do.
And as for money being a big help that's not the case either I've been really down when I've had plenty and everything's going well.
Add on top of that, a fragile self-belief and it's a recurring recipe for potential disaster. It sounds as though you occupy a similar head space to me.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
Add on top of that, a fragile self-belief and it's a recurring recipe for potential disaster. It sounds as though you occupy a similar head space to me.
Indeed so although I think I'm really being positive lately just changing the way I think without it creeping at me to much in the background.
I definitely think exercise and positivity help massively.
I feel I can control my thoughts in the right way now and shake it off better.
 
Indeed so although I think I'm really being positive lately just changing the way I think without it creeping at me to much in the background.
I definitely think exercise and positivity help massively.
I feel I can control my thoughts in the right way now and shake it off better.
I do a fair bit of cycling although not as much as I would like( the cyclists' lament!) Exercise and positivity does help so look at what you're good at as well as your obvious skills as an experienced tradesman and one who takes pride in what he does.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
I do a fair bit of cycling although not as much as I would like( the cyclists' lament!) Exercise and positivity does help so look at what you're good at as well as your obvious skills as an experienced tradesman and one who takes pride in what he does.
Absolutely agree. Some fair points.
I used to race road bikes tough sport really enjoyed it travelled everywhere with it.
I used to blame plastering for it at times. But now I honestly enjoy the good with the bad in a much better place. I hope you are too.
 

johnzo

Active Member
I not sure how many of you guys work alone but I think anyone that has a hint of depression this is a big no no ,u can have the radio up full volume but if your on your own u start to think u go on not your head and as I said previously sometimes that's a very bad place to be ,I work with a crew and if I see someone looking down I'll ask is everything ok how they are feeling ,for years it's been swept under the carpet aaa his fine or toughen up have a pint dont be soft ,I think talking is the key .mental health is just as important as physical health if not more so .we only have 1 life guys lets try make the best of it ,
 

lurpak

Artex Boy
I’m constantly in my head and work alone. Can’t switch it off I think I have adhd of the mind.


 

Stevieo

Royal Spin Doctor
Absolutely agree. Some fair points.
I used to race road bikes tough sport really enjoyed it travelled everywhere with it.
I used to blame plastering for it at times. But now I honestly enjoy the good with the bad in a much better place. I hope you are too.
Been there.... blamed everything except myself and couldn't enjoy my (very well paid building boom) work.

I was thinking about all this today actually ....My best mate took his own life - the guy on the right. People have been passing old photos around recently.

I've no idea why. Everything seemed to be going his way. I saw him not too long before, then there were a couple of things that he over-reacted to.

We saw the same 'active service' so I doubt it was directly related to any tours we did. They weren't THAT bad. He was employed and doing just fine.

He leaves behind a wife who still uses his name, two children and untold problems between them and his mother who has never recovered. Won't speak to his wife or her grandchildren. I think she blames them. His mother won't speak to me either, I don't know why. It wasn't like I've done anything wrong.

Everybody lost on that one and nobody knows why. He never said a word.

 

Nicm

Well-Known Member
Paralysis from analysis.In other words too much thinking is not good in certain circumstances.
 
Absolutely agree. Some fair points.
I used to race road bikes tough sport really enjoyed it travelled everywhere with it.
I used to blame plastering for it at times. But now I honestly enjoy the good with the bad in a much better place. I hope you are too.
Aah, a fellow wheelman! look where that conversation took us? Are you going to watch the tour next year? I climbed the Tourmalet and Puy de Dome years ago while watching the tour. What a sense of achievement and a real insight into what it takes to be a pro rider. Feeling much better thanks after this exchange. Pleasure exchanging words with you.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
Been there.... blamed everything except myself and couldn't enjoy my (very well paid building boom) work.

I was thinking about all this today actually ....My best mate took his own life - the guy on the right. People have been passing old photos around recently.

I've no idea why. Everything seemed to be going his way. I saw him not too long before, then there were a couple of things that he over-reacted to.

We saw the same 'active service' so I doubt it was directly related to any tours we did. They weren't THAT bad. He was employed and doing just fine.

He leaves behind a wife who still uses his name, two children and untold problems between them and his mother who has never recovered. Won't speak to his wife or her grandchildren. I think she blames them. His mother won't speak to me either, I don't know why. It wasn't like I've done anything wrong.

Everybody lost on that one and nobody knows why. He never said a word.

It's a massive shame to hear. Nothing is unfixable or curable even with that stubborn frame of mind eating at you.
I'm glad the awareness is being noticed more to help others before it's too late. Most cases you will never even no there suffering which is the hardest part to take in when tragedy happens.
As said above I like noise and company and for me the radio can be enough has reverse effects sometimes when I come home. And that's when should be your happiest. I'm surprised I've said so much here if you were face to face with me it would be a different story.
As well as the sad news it's good to hear everyone else's thoughts.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
Aah, a fellow wheelman! look where that conversation took us? Are you going to watch the tour next year? I climbed the Tourmalet and Puy de Dome years ago while watching the tour. What a sense of achievement and a real insight into what it takes to be a pro rider. Feeling much better thanks after this exchange. Pleasure exchanging words with you.
Well this forums full of surprises. You no I never got chance to go over it would mostly interfere with holidays around that time something I'd love to go and do. Sounds like you had a good one. I don't get chance to go on the bike these days three kids pretty limited to time.
Absolutely .really good speaking with you two nice to hear you're in a good frame of mind. I certainly hope never to be back there again keep positive.
 

Stevieo

Royal Spin Doctor
It's a massive shame to hear. Nothing is unfixable or curable even with that stubborn frame of mind eating at you.
I'm glad the awareness is being noticed more to help others before it's too late. Most cases you will never even no there suffering which is the hardest part to take in when tragedy happens.
As said above I like noise and company and for me the radio can be enough has reverse effects sometimes when I come home. And that's when should be your happiest. I'm surprised I've said so much here if you were face to face with me it would be a different story.
As well as the sad news it's good to hear everyone else's thoughts.
I've been around a few people having issues....

I have a very clear point of view on all this - I won't speak to anyone about mental health until they are eating properly, sleeping properly and making some effort to keep comparatively fit.

That's not to say that I think that you can exercise your way out of mental illness or that it's not real.....but if you can stabilise each day yourself with simple steps, then things become a whole lot clearer for you, or maybe the doctor.
 

Formby plastering

Well-Known Member
I've been around a few people having issues....

I have a very clear point of view on all this - I won't speak to anyone about mental health until they are eating properly, sleeping properly and making some effort to keep comparatively fit.

That's not to say that I think that you can exercise your way out of mental illness or that it's not real.....but if you can stabilise each day yourself with simple steps, then things become a whole lot clearer for you, or maybe the doctor.
That maybe something that's changed Massive in my life diet.. Since moving in with the missus really good healthy food everything freshly cut and cooked. Rarely eating as much crap.
Although I'm bad with coffee it's better than smoking or drugs.
I Think having a plan has been really important to me living to achieve something instead of living and passing time. I have a whole new way of thinking now which has helped. Complete change of views instead of thinking the worst about everything or everyone.
 

Stevieo

Royal Spin Doctor
That maybe something that's changed Massive in my life diet.. Since moving in with the missus really good healthy food everything freshly cut and cooked. Rarely eating as much crap.
Although I'm bad with coffee it's better than smoking or drugs.
I Think having a plan has been really important to me living to achieve something instead of living and passing time. I have a whole new way of thinking now which has helped. Complete change of views instead of thinking the worst about everything or everyone.
I went down during the boom. Long after, I realised that it was basically because I'd overdone the drink.

Many years later, a close friend went down. Much worse than me - psychiatrists banging on the windows and all that. Total life falling apart stuff. The medics couldn't take apart the alcoholism and the schizophrenia.... it was a total pain in the arse.

It went on for a considerable time. More than a year anyway.


Every one of the other 'clients of the health service' that I met in that time wasn't looking after themselves. The doctor begged them to but they didn't.

During that time, I moved to Burnley and did some work on line. It was a p**i area and I was very isolated. I caught myself though, (after I'd put on 40lb) and got a dog. With the dog came routine. With routine came better things. With that came the gym. With the gym came better eating and with that I felt great, even in s**t circumstances. And off came the 40lb.

It was hard work but I was happy in circumstances which had almost killed me ten years ago.
 
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